If you’re a novelist looking to bring your story to life, it’s important for you to learn about playing with narrative distance. Playing with narrative distance may sound like an abstract term, but actually you can just think of it as a camera lens that zooms in and out, allowing you to reveal your imagined world from both a closeup and a pulled back perspective.

What is narrative distance?

Narrative distance is the space between your readers and your characters. In some moments, you’ll want your readers to be right next to (or even in the shoes of) your characters, letting them see what they are seeing, hear what they are hearing, smell what they are smelling, and even give them access to what your characters are thinking. At other times, you might pull back and look at the bigger picture, giving your reader a wider sense of the world around them, or a sense of distance from a situation.

The best part? By learning how to play with this narrative distance, you can enhance your storytelling and control the emotional tone of your scenes.

Zooming In: Getting Close to Your Character

When you zoom in on your character, you’re getting so close that you can feel their emotions, sense the world around them, and even hear the thoughts racing through their mind. This deep connection allows your reader to become immersed in the character’s inner world, creating intimacy and empathy, and ensuring your readers are really invested, and really engaged.

So, how do you pull off this technique? Here are a couple of ways:

1. Focus on Sensory Details:

Describe what the character is experiencing through their senses. What are they touching, seeing, smelling, or hearing? When you zoom in, these details will feel more immediate and personal. Take care not to use filter words like heard, saw, observed, realised, felt. The example I always give is this:
He heard a dog bark – this is telling your readers that your character can hear a dog bark.
A dog barked – this is showing your readers that a dog is barking, and lets them hear it for themselves.

2. Use Deep Point of View/Free Indirect Speech

Instead of narrating events from a distance, let the character’s voice dominate. Free indirect speech (FIS) lets your character’s thoughts flow directly onto the page, blending the point of view character’s thoughts with the narrative.

For example:
He wondered whether it was going to rain or snow, and couldn’t work out what was going on with the weather. This is telling us that the character is wondering what is going on. This is distant – it’s being described to us.
“What is going on with the weather?” he wondered. “Is it going to rain? Or snow?” This is closer, showing us what he is thinking, using direct thought.
What on earth was going on with the weather? Was it going to rain? Or snow? This is really up close – you are inside the character’s head, experiencing his inner dialogue.

This makes readers feel like they’re experiencing everything right alongside your character, in real time.

Zooming Out: Creating a Broader View

When you zoom out, you shift your focus away from your character’s personal experience and move it to the world around them. This technique is great for providing context or setting the scene, or moving things on quickly using a summary of events. You can reveal the landscape, describe a bustling city street, or show how your character fits into a bigger picture. By pulling back, you allow your readers to see how everything connects.

Here are some methods to zoom out effectively:

1. Shift to a Larger Scope

Instead of focusing on the character’s immediate emotions, show the setting, the environment, or the larger conflict at play. This gives the reader a bird’s-eye view of what’s happening.

2. Multiple Points of View

If you’re writing in third person, switching to a different character’s perspective can offer a more detached view of the situation. You might show how your main character’s actions fit into the greater plot, or how others are reacting to the same event.

3. Use Abstract Descriptions

Rather than describing things from a personal perspective, you can make use of broader, more abstract descriptions. For instance, instead of saying “She was nervous,” you might describe the stormy weather or the sense of unease in the room.

Example showing the difference, using a Romance/Fantasy extract

Firstly, zoomed out:
The evening air was crisp, with a hint of magic that hung in the wind. Tall, dark trees stretched out over the path, their branches almost seeming to whisper in the fading light. The world around her felt both vast and unknown, as if time itself had stopped for just a moment.

And then zoomed in:
The cold air bit at her skin, but it was the magic that sent a shiver down her spine. Her heart raced, maybe from the chill or maybe from the strangeness that lingered in the air – something ancient, something powerful. She reached out, fingertips brushing the rough bark of the nearest tree, and for a brief moment, the whispering winds seemed to speak directly to her.

Why Does Narrative Distance Matter?

Why you should bother with all this shifting of perspective? Using both close and wide narrative distances allows you to control how your reader experiences your story. Close-ups build tension, emotional depth, and connection, while wide shots offer a sense of scale, context, and anticipation.

This is especially important when your novel involves complex emotional journeys (romance; romantasy) or grand, sweeping adventures (fantasy; romantasy; sci-fi). By manipulating narrative distance, you can heighten the emotional stakes in romantic scenes or make the fantasy world feel larger and more immersive.

How to Use Narrative Distance in Your Writing

If you want to play with narrative distance in your fiction, try writing the same scene using both techniques. Start with a zoomed-in, deeply personal moment, and rewrite the scene, giving your readers a bigger perspective by pulling the camera back. This will help you learn how to switch between the two as you write, enhancing the experience for your readers.

Whether you’re writing the first kiss of your romantic fantasy, or the moment your character realises their destiny, changing your narrative distance will help you craft a more dynamic and engaging story.

Final Tip for Playing With Narrative Distance

Don’t be afraid to experiment with these techniques within one scene. You don’t have to stick to one narrative distance throughout a scene or a chapter. The beauty of storytelling is that you can zoom in for those intimate moments and then pull back to reveal the bigger picture. Your readers will thank you for it! If you’d like support with your manuscript please do get in touch.

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As with most things fiction, there are many ways to add emphasis to your writing, and there are no “rules”. However, there are conventions and – more importantly – reader expectations. And which method you choose can have an impact on reader engagement, which in turn will have an impact on your book sales.

Italics

A common way to add emphasis to your writing is to use italics. This is probably the first choice for many fiction authors, but there are a couple of caveats. Firstly, what else are you using italics for? Frequently, italics are used to indicate a character’s thoughts or inner dialogue, and they are often used for flashbacks or quoted text. Some authors still choose to italicise words that are not English (although this custom is becoming less common).

So be careful not to confuse your readers by using italics for too many different things.

Also be aware that large chunks of text in italics can be wearing on the eye, and italics doesn’t always translate well on e-readers.

CAPITAL LETTERS and Capital Initial Letters

Using capital letters does certainly bring emphasis, but it can also bring irritation. Frequently, readers see capital letters as a way of indicating that a character is SHOUTING. Which, in itself, is absolutely fine. However, a character who’s CONSTANTLY SHOUTING can undermine their credibility, and (worse), the credibility of your writing. When used judiciously, capitals can work well – particularly when just the Initial Letter is capitalised. Capitalising just the initial letter(s) adds a layer of importance, giving the word equal weight with a Proper Noun.

But again, capitals can get a little shouty, and again, they should be used judiciously.

Exclamation Marks!

Exclamation marks are used to indicate moments of high tension, drama and humour, and they are fantastic at indicating to your reader that they need to bring a degree of energy to the sentence they are reading.

However, it’s really hard to maintain a high level of energy for a prolonged period of time, so try to avoid having multiple consecutive sentences ending in an exclamation mark! Some readers are also irritated by the use of exclamation marks, and I always recommend they are limited where possible, and used only for really intense/dramatic moments. This can mean using exclamation marks only once or twice per chapter, or even once or twice per book.

Where a character is exclaiming something, then it’s only necessary to use either an exclamation mark, or the “she exclaimed” dialogue tag. Not both.

If overused, exclamation marks will start to lose their impact. So again, judicious use is recommended.

Interrobangs ?!

The combination of the question mark and the exclamation mark is known as an interrobang. The interrobang is a little like the baddum-tish at the end of a bad joke – it wouldn’t be necessary if the joke was better. Interrobangs are like a pumped-up exclamation mark that comes along to smack you in the face. If this is the effect you are looking for, then of course please go ahead. But if you want a more subtle emphasis, then definitely choose a different option.

Bold text and Underlined text

Publishers rarely use bold text in the body of a book – generally it’s reserved for titles and headings, and underlined text can make things look cluttered.

So how should you add emphasis to your writing?

Where a character is having an extreme reaction to something, this should be clear from the words they are using, the length of their sentences, the way their body moves and the way other characters are reacting to them.

When you want your reader to have a reaction to something in the text, the same conventions apply. Manipulate their responses using a different sentence structure – like this one – that brings emphasis to words or actions purely by the way it’s put together.

Show your readers moments of intensity with careful vocabulary and thoughtful writing craft rather than telling them about it with punctuation.

And if you do choose to use italics, capitals, exclamation marks or interrobangs, make sure to only use them one at a time. Avoid sentences that Include Capitals, WORDS THAT ARE ITALICISED, and that end in an exclamation mark! Because these are just plain irritating.

Don’t forget that your editor can help you with this as part of their line editing or developmental editing services, and please do get in touch with any questions.

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The Heart of Your Story: Why Characters Matter

Characters are at the very heart of your story. They drive the plot and make your readers laugh and cry. They connect your readers to the narrative. It doesn’t matter how sophisticated your plot is, without well-developed characters it’s going to fall short. A truly compelling character can elevate your book from good to excellent.

Know Your Characters Inside Out

Before you start writing, spend some time getting to know your characters. Create detailed character profiles. Include their background, personality traits, motivations, and even their quirks. Think about their childhood, their relationships with family and friends … the more you know about them, the more authentic they’ll feel.

Show, Don’t Tell

Showing rather than telling is particularly important when it comes to creating compelling characters. Instead of stating that a character is brave, show them in a situation where they have to face their fears. Use actions, dialogue, and internal monologues to reveal who they are. This approach not only makes your characters more believable but also engages readers more deeply.

Give Them Flaws

No human being is perfect, so neither should your characters be. Perfect characters can also be a little boring, whereas imperfections make them interesting and relatable. Give your characters flaws, weaknesses, and struggles. These human traits make them more relatable and provide room for growth and development. Think of Elizabeth Bennet’s prejudice or Harry Potter’s impulsiveness – these flaws make them memorable and endearing.

Develop Strong Motivations

Your characters need clear motivations that drive their actions and decisions. Think about what they want, but also think about why they want it, and what they are willing to do to achieve it. Characters with vague or weak motivations are less convincing, and fail to fully engage the reader. Strong motivations, by contrast, add depth and believability.

Let Them Evolve

Characters need to be changed by what they experience during your story. They need to evolve. Their experiences should shape them … and this transformation is what keeps readers invested. Whether it’s a hero overcoming their fears or a villain finding redemption, character arcs are essential for a satisfying narrative. Ensure your characters’ growth feels natural and earned, not forced or rushed.

Dialogue: Make It Count

Dialogue is a powerful tool for character development. Each character should have a distinct voice that reflects their personality, background, and motivations. Try not to make your characters sound the same. Can you tell who is speaking, just by the way their dialogue is written? Pay attention to their speech patterns (long or short sentences?), vocabulary (which may be dictated by their education), and tone. Well-crafted dialogue can reveal a lot about a character without needing to spell it out.

Conclusion: Keep Crafting Compelling Characters

Creating compelling characters is both an art and a science. It requires creativity, empathy, and attention to detail. As an editor, my job is to help writers bring their characters to life in the most authentic and engaging way possible. So, keep crafting, keep refining, and most importantly, keep believing in your characters. They are, after all, the heart and soul of your story.

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A copyeditor will help you with these concerns, but if you can address some of them yourself, you will save your editor time (and therefore save yourself some money).

1. Formatting

Manuscripts should be delivered to the copyeditor in the right format – normally this will be a Microsoft Word document (but check this with your editor first).

Make sure you use page breaks between each chapter (CTRL-enter will do this for you), rather than hitting the paragraph return multiple times to push a new chapter onto a new page.

In fiction, the first line in each paragraph is indented (1.27 cm is the standard) except for the first paragraph of a new section/chapter, which is flush left. Use proper indents rather than hitting the tab key.

Double space your manuscript (format this properly, don’t just hit return at the end of each line), and set the typeface to something sensible (most editors will ask for Times New Roman, 12 pt).

2. Overusing Adverbs and Adjectives

While adverbs and adjectives can enhance your writing, their overuse can lead to wordiness and weaken your prose. Instead, focus on choosing strong verbs and nouns to convey your message effectively.

Be selective in your use of modifiers to maintain conciseness. Rather than running quickly, let your characters sprint or hurry.

I’ve written a separate blog post about adverbs which discusses how there are strong adverbs and weak adverbs, and when best to use them.

3. Lack of Consistency

Inconsistencies in character names, settings, and timelines can confuse readers and disrupt the narrative flow.

Your copyeditor will generally create a style sheet as they are working through your manuscript – documenting each editorial decision about spelling choice, and including a brief description of each of your characters to make sure they don’t suddenly change eye colour (unless it’s deliberate!).

However, if you keep a style sheet of your own, this will help you to be consistent as you write/self-edit, and it will also be a massive help to your editor. This will save both you and your editor a lot of time and effort.

4. Show, Don’t Tell

One common mistake is “telling” the readers what’s happening instead of “showing” through descriptive details and actions.

Allow readers to immerse themselves in your story by painting vivid scenes and letting them draw their conclusions.

Lots of writers are told to “show, don’t tell”, without anyone explaining to them what this really means. I’ve untangled some of the misconceptions in my blog post about balancing show and tell.

5. Weak Dialogue

Dialogue is a powerful tool for character development and plot progression. Authors often make the mistake of creating dialogue that feels forced or unrealistic.

To improve your dialogue, eavesdrop on real conversations, pay attention to speech patterns, and make sure each character has a distinct voice. See my blog post about strengthening dialogue.

In Conclusion

Writing and editing are integral parts of the author’s journey. By avoiding these five common writing mistakes and being diligent in your editing process, you can significantly improve the quality of your manuscript before you send it to an editor – this will save your editor time, and save you money!

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Understanding the Difference Between Showing and Telling

To create a compelling narrative, it’s important to understand the distinction between showing and telling. “Showing” calls on observable details – the senses, actions, and dialogue. It allows readers to experience the story alongside the characters, firsthand. It lets readers see what the characters are seeing, feel what they are feeling, smell what they are smelling. It invites readers to visualize scenes, feel emotions, and draw their own conclusions.

On the other hand, “telling” is conveying information directly to readers without allowing them to engage their senses or draw their own inferences.

The Power of Showing in Creating Vivid Imagery

Showing plays a crucial role in immersing readers in the world you’ve created. By using vivid descriptions, sensory details, and evocative language, you can paint a vivid picture in readers’ minds.

For example, instead of telling readers that the room was tidy, you can show them by describing how books are alphabetised on the shelves, how shoes are lined up on the shoe rack, how the kitchen surfaces are clean and clear.

This allows readers to visualize the scene and connect with the characters in their environment. When a reader has to work things out for themselves – by observing the behaviour of a character, rather than being told about it – they will be invested in your story. This is how to write a page-turner!

Using Dialogue and Action to Show Emotions

Dialogue and character actions are effective tools for showing emotions and inner thoughts. Rather than explicitly stating a character’s feelings, let their words and actions reveal their emotional state.

For some emotions, it’s easy to imagine how a character will look – for instance, instead of telling readers that a character is sad, have a tear roll down their cheek – but others are a little more tricky. Instead of saying a character is nonchalant, maybe they could gaze around a room as they are speaking, or be looking out of a window.

This allows readers to experience the emotion alongside the character, narrowing the narrative distance and fostering a deeper connection.

For ideas on how to show emotion, you might like to have a look at The Emotion Thesaurus by Becca Puglisi and Angela Ackerman – it gives you suggestions on how a character might act if they feel a particular emotion, including internal feelings and external observable characteristics.

Telling is Excellent for Summarising

While showing is a powerful tool for bringing your reader in so they are really close to your characters, there are instances where telling can be more useful. Telling helps provide context, summarize information, and maintain a good pace in your narrative. It allows you to condense time or convey necessary background information efficiently. You don’t want to tell too much though as an info dump will disconnect your readers.

Telling should be used at times when you want to increase the narrative distance – for overviews, flashbacks and backstories.

However, be cautious not to rely too heavily on telling, as it can distance readers from the story. Reserve telling for moments where it serves a purpose and complements the showing elements. And always watch out for info dumps!

Balancing Showing vs Telling in Your Writing

Balancing showing vs telling is not easy.

As a general guideline, use showing for crucial moments that drive the plot, create tension, or evoke emotions. Use telling for transitions, summaries, or when the information doesn’t require the full immersive experience. Strive for a mix of both techniques to create a dynamic narrative that engages readers while not bogging them down.

In Conclusion

If you aren’t sure about balancing showing vs telling in writing, why not request a free sample edit? I can then have a look at your extract and provide feedback.

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